I hope you live a life that you’re proud of and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.-Benjamin Button

Time heals all wounds

To me; fearless is not the absence of fear. its not being completely unafraid. to me; fearless is having fears. fearless is having doubts. lots of them. to me; fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. fearless is falling madly in love again; even though you’ve been hurt before. fearless is walking into your freshmen year of high school at fifteen. fearless is getting back up & fighting for what you want over and over again; even though every time you’ve tried before, you’ve lost. its fearless to have faith that someday things will change. fearless is having the courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, even if you can’t breathe without them. i think its fearless to fall for your best friend, even though hes in love with someone else. & when someone apologizes to you enough times for things they’ll never stop doing, i think its fearless to stop believing them. its fearless to say “you’re not sorry”, and walk away. i think loving someone despite what people think is fearless. i think allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor is fearless. letting go is fearless. then, moving on and being alright; thats fearless too. but no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it. you have to believe in love stories & prince charmings & happily ever after. thats why i write these songs. because i think love is fearless.~Taylor swift

Thursday, April 30, 2009

rant of everything? I guess

So I was all down yesterday and then i was thinking about something and so i was after school and i just got up and said guys hold this and ran .. i ran from the track to the school and back to the track and to the school over and over again.. not gonna lie it did work! but only for like 15 min, but had i run more it would have worked i guess. Thinking of going back to delaware reminds me of last year...I mean I was almost in love with rebecca at the time and then I was best friends with liz and i was bi and i was confused and tiny and didnt know which way to turn. But I realized I have grown up so much this past year its crazy. I am all sad though i mean scott broke my heart and i dont even think perry wants to be my friend .. but the whole scott thing I mean he asked me last year to go to prom and I said yes then he asked MYBESTFRIEND! like are you fucken kidding me! thats sooo stupid! then he tells me the reason hes not taking me which are things I either have nothing to do with or things I cant change about myself. And honestly if i could change them I don't think I would because like I love who I am to day and always. I havent cut in like 91 days and yes i do miss people but Ill get over it .. i ignore it everyday and it works. So another reason Im sad

next month exactly may 27th is the day my heart broke ...the day all the shit and stupid things happed .... from this time till may 30th is when all the shit went down last year. Istarted cutting I fell for rebecca I became friends with liz I got my hear broken by megan ... when she and anthony started going out on may 27th ... may27th and now its their one year! and May is my dads birthday .. i think its also mothers day. And its all these things I hate!.... This part of the year just makes me really upset. Well like I dont know

I love all my friends!!! sooo so so much and without everysingle one of them from the one i never see to the one that wont talk to me as much to the really annoying one I still love all of them from the bottom of my heart. I love rebecca ariella brooke liz melissa I love eeman megan sarah rachel josh jake scott and like a lot more people I LOVE THEM ALL SOO MUCH and if werent for each and everyone of you I would not have survived between last year and this year. Actually When i was at boarding school Melissa helped me the most, but we dont talk anymore because like liz told her to ignore me or something stupid little freshman do. Well like I love allof you soo much. I came back from boarding school for Liz and my friends and you know whats Ironic is that i came back for liz and I was forced to break up with her 2 weeks after I got back .... Irather be away .,... from here...... far away


I want wings
and I
want to
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..
...
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fly
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